wtf world

So, I auditioned for a spot in the dance department at Stephens College and didn't get in.
I was second guessing myself during the Christmas break if I wanted to continue dance after high school, and before I went in to audition, I thought "Yeah, maybe this is what I'm gonna do." And I didn't make it, so maybe this means that this isn't want I'm supposed to do in life. I mean, yeah, sure, people think I can dance, but I'm obviously not completely ready for it. Not good enough, I guess.
Maybe there will be a casting call for a hot new movie and I'll get cast as the lead and become a movie star and not have to go to college.
Ohh, if only the world was that kind to me.
Coach Beatty said that when doors close, new ones open. And she said, if a door this big is going to close, then a big door is going to open.
Please open, soon, big door. I need you right now. I'm unhappy (not only about the audition fiasco) and I need something a-FUCKING-mazing to happen to me.

What the hell is wrong with the world?

I just found out yesterday that a friend of mine form middle school died two nights ago. This is the second friend that has died this year. I'm eighteen; my friends shouldn't be dying already.

I read this article about it on chron.com:

A northwest Houston man remains in custody today after fatally shooting a teenager Sunday night with what he apparently believed was an unloaded pistol, police said.

Allison Aubrecht, 17, died after she was shot at about 5:30 p.m. during a part at a home on the 6500 block of Westview.

Six to eight people, in their teens to early 20s, were at the home when Robert Odom, 20, began waving a small-calliber pistol about the room, Houston police said. Believing the gun to be unloaded, Odom placed it against the back of Aubrecht's head and pulled the trigger, investigators said.

She died at the scene.

Odom was among three people who had been leasing the home. Police believed Aubrecht also occasionally stayed there. Investigators found evidence of drug and alcohol use during a search of the home, but did not say whether they believe it played a part in the shooting.

"There were no arguments and no fights prior to the incident," said homicide Sgt. R.D. Chandler.

Odom was arrested and charged with manslaughter. He remains in the Harris Country Jail with bail set at $30,000.

How careless can you be?

And this is why I don't attend stupid parties.